


Letter Home

by gaytotaldrama



Category: Total Drama
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-27
Updated: 2014-01-27
Packaged: 2018-01-16 22:43:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1364446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaytotaldrama/pseuds/gaytotaldrama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gwen writes a letter to Courtney expressing her regrets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letter Home

Dear Courtney,

I’m not sure if you’ll ever read this, because I’m not sure if I’ll even send it to you. But I have some stuff I need to say, even if it’s just to this paper that no one will ever read.

First of all, I guess I should just come out and say this: I love you. I have since London, maybe even since before that. And I don’t mean that I love you as a friend, or that you’re like a sister to me, I mean I really, truly love you, the way I was supposed to love Trent or Duncan but didn’t.

Anyway, now that I’ve dropped that bomb on you, let’s move on to the next thing I have to say: I’m sorry. For so many reasons, Courtney, I’m sorry for more than you think. For kissing Duncan. That’s the obvious one, I know. And for trying to convince myself I’d done nothing wrong, for not breaking it off with him immediately, and most of all, for ignoring the fact that I hurt you. I should have voted myself off, I should’ve apologized to you sooner than I did. Courtney, there’s so many things I should’ve done, and I hate myself for not doing them.

And I’m sorry being a bad friend. Again. I know I shouldn’t have gotten so mad at you for the chart, but I was hurt. I felt like I was losing you to Scott, and I know that’s stupid, and it’s a lame excuse for how I acted. After all I had done to you, you still forgave me, and then when you messed up, I was too selfish and petty to forgive you.

I forgive you now, though. I can’t expect you to forgive me again. You gave me a second chance and I blew it. Again.

So we might not ever be friends again, and I definitely can’t expect us to be anything more than that. I can live with that. What I can’t live with is you thinking I hate you, so I’ve just decided that I am going to send you this letter. I’ll say it again, Courtney: I love you. And I wish I’d told you sooner, and I wish you could love me back.

You’re all I ever wanted.

Love,  
Gwen


End file.
